Selfish: refusing to criminally terrorize a bunch of innocents and be justly locked away.
Not selfish: demanding the criminal terrorize their victims and get locked away so you can meet a nice boy.
Got it? Got it.
Naturally this is portrayed as an issue of identity (narcissism) or freedom or whatever, because even peasants would be able to untangle this one if they spent any time thinking about it. Divert. Distract.
P.S. Catspaw mechanics. Doing evil at one remove so as to dodge the blame. Every striver's greatest dream, apparently. E.g. repeating every racial slur and blood libel but saying, "These words are bad, don't use them," at the end. Incite things but use plausible deniability.