"There is an old joke that the ability of the Church to survive such gross mismanagement is evidence of divine favor."
Specifically, Satan's favor.
Step 1: worship something holy instead of Satan.
Result: have institutions that aren't grossly mismanaged.
At this level you can, just, like, decide not to suck. Stop machine-gunning your own foot. Skip the albatross. Maybe keep the knife away from your nose. Forgo millstones. Just drop the shovel. It's not buried treasure down there, it's literally Hell.