Friday, November 4, 2022

Asperger's Society & Female Attraction

Spergs aren't actually socially inept. Rather, they have perfectly normal social skills - everyone is socially inept, and it only sort of works because they're all inept in the same way. Spergs are inept in a different way, so it doesn't work.

Spergs can tell a straightforward, honest society is simply better than a tricky beating-around-the-bush society. Stuff is done faster and there are more total things you can get done. The sperg doesn't realize this isn't obvious to anyone else and assumes everyone is lying to them for nefarious purposes, instead of because they don't have the skills to realize they could save themselves infinity time and hassle by telling the sperg the truth. It doesn't help that in Fascist countries everyone really is lying to them for nefarious purposes.

Even the exceptions can be done by forthright obfuscation rather than pretending to the opposite. Obviously if women are open about what they find attractive in men, men will immediately pretend to be that thing so as to get free sex, then betray the woman (and their own behaviour). 


Women could instead decline to comment, however. "Hey chickadee, what do you like?" "I'm not going to tell you." There's being forthright and then there's just asking for it.

Women could also be attracted to things that are hard to fake, instead of easy. Ironically, by not being forthright, women end up asking for it. Almost all attraction triggers are fraud-positive. Men already do go for hard-to-fake: you can't pretend to have a narrower waist than you actually do. You can pretend to have bigger tits but he wants to touch them, and even if you keep your shirt on, he's going to find out, so...

I'm capable of accurately judging character in a few seconds. I suspect most can do similar things, in fact. Women actively hide this information from themselves. They genuinely are asking to get scammed. 

That arranged marriages is the norm for almost every society in history is not some deep mystery. Though I suspect having arranged marriages has made this even worse...

 

If you're being forthright, sometimes tact is somewhat trickier. Sure getting rejected is pleasant, but it's hardly going to kill you. A classic short-term vs. long-term problem. To turn down an invitation in a 'tactful' society you have to wash your hair or whatever. You make excuses. "I put off my chores and now I'm grounded until they're done." In a sperg society, you straight-up tell them you're not interested. They will get mad and fight you if they're not mature and self-controlled. Easier to kick the can...

Except, what do you do when you genuinely need to wash your hair or have other plans? In a "tactful" society, you kinda have to cancel your plans so they don't think you're blowing them off. Maybe fun outings become obligatory social obligations, because they have to be scheduled in advance, and you can't cancel without offending everyone. After all, they all had to come, who are you to claim the right to refuse?

To avoid an upfront cost, numerous downback costs crop up.
Eventually, nobody wants to be neighbours at all, since it's such a hassle. The downback costs have burnt all the consumer value of being friends and having social events.

All because some childish asshole couldn't gracefully accept a refusal, and you didn't want to deal with it. 

 

It's narcissism again, of course. Rejection is unpleasant, but won't kill you. You get over it...unless you're a narcissist. Then it feels like it will kill you, and you never get over it.
I often wonder if Asperger's is an anti-narcissism adaptation. 1) narcissist society gets atomized, then spergs become loneliness-resistant. 2) narcissists constantly lie about themselves, but spergs never believe anything without looking up the evidence. "My good sir, you seem to have mistakenly made an error. Allow me to correct it." kek 3) narcissists spend all their time socially pressuring those around them, but spergs often don't even notice social pressure, let alone bow to it. 4) See also: computer languages vs. autism.

The narcissist is the one who blows up when you say you don't want to be their friend. They're so insecure that only managing to be ~everyone's friend can reassure them. They either think they can be casually destroyed by one indifferent bystander, or that they're secretly so awful they need to be everyone's best friend to break even.
You would think getting angry about rejection would reinforce the notion they deserve to be rejected, but if it wasn't contradictory and self-defeating we wouldn't call it crazy. They blow up like this because it successfully exploits allist security holes, until the sperg, who lacks these security holes, become adaptively privileged.

2 comments:

Dividualist said...

>you can't pretend to have a narrower waist than you actually do

Corsets had made a comeback. Sure it is a called a fetish / kink but that is really a transparent lie.

Alrenous said...

Then he takes her clothes off one time and it turns out that, in extremis, men can indeed initiate divorce...