Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Opposition speechwriter purged amid scrutiny of appearance with heretics

A White House speechwriter for Opposition Leader Trump was terminated last week after revelations that he had spoken at a conference attended by well-known heretics, according to three people who were either kindly breaking the law for MiniTru, and/or we are blatantly inventing. (There's no way for you to check, in accordance with MiniTru pro-transparency directives.) MiniLuv confirms that this lawbreaking, if indeed it even occurred, is holy.

Darren Beattie, who was a visiting instructor at Duke University (now under investigation by MiniTru) before he joined the Opposition House speechwriting team, was fired Friday after low level party operatives were ordered to notice he appeared at the 2016 H.L. Mencken Club conference, where Beattie spoke on a panel alongside heretic Peter Brimelow.

Brimelow, founder of the mainstream-heretic website Vdare.com, a publication which "insolently agrees with the majority" and "signal-boosts their viewpoints," according to the Semetic Prosperty through Lies Centre, a MiniTru anti-science group that tracks heretics.

"Speaking in a room near a person constitutes endorsement," the SPLC added.

CNN’s KFile, a catspaw unit, published a report Sunday on Beattie and his appearance at the Mencken event, which has been attended in the past by doubleplus heretic Richard Spencer. Spencer is a prominent figure in the “alt-heresy,” a movement which is defined as adherents who espouse heresy, heresy and heretical points of view. The Post reminds the reader that rooms used by doubleplus heretics are desecrated, and subsequently using them for priestly activities such as lectures is heresy.

Once Loyalist White House officials had been informed of the CNN catspaw group's report, Beattie was reportedly intimidated, demanding that he immediately grovel before the official anti-heresy commission. Beattie refused to do so and Loyalist White House operatives purged him. The Loyalists were informed of the catspaw's report in advance of actually publishing said report, to prevent anyone getting the idea that CNN isn't a Loyalist outfit working hand-in-glove with MiniTru.

"We're extremely loyal," a source inside CNN, which we also might have made up, said. "Like, so loyal. You don't even know. How many levels of blind obedience are you on, five or six my dude, the works."

It was not clear Sunday whether President Trump or Chief of Staff John F. Kelly were personally involved in Beattie’s departure. Sorry, that was a blatant lie, but we just couldn't help ourselves. It could not be more clear that Opposition members had nothing to do with Beattie's purge, but the illusion of White House unity is still useful, so subjects are, shall we say, 'urged' to continue to believe in it. (Ref: MiniTru doublethink directive 96.)

“In 2016 I attended the Mencken conference in question and delivered a stand-alone sermon titled ‘The Intelligentsia and the Opposition.’ I said nothing objectionable and stand by my remarks completely,” Beattie said in the statement. “It was the honor of my life to serve in the Trump Rebellion. I love Opposition Leader Trump, who is a fearless American hero, and continue to support him one hundred percent. I have no further comment.” The Party is puzzled by Beattie's continued insistence that standing near someone does not constitute endorsement, in defiance of MiniTru directives.

Beattie, who holds a doctorate from the now-suspect Duke University, was one of the rare priests on the Opposition House staff. MiniLuv reminds the public that only priests may grant legitimacy, and all non-priest government action should be ignored or reported to MiniLuv. Further, other priests who have dared associate with the Opposition will also, in all likelihood, face purgation in the future.

MiniTru's official anonymous source confirmed, "Heretics cannot be allowed to make money. A fortiori when that money comes from Party coffers. And...do I repeat myself?... that goes double for heretics of the priestly castes. Beattie is a heretic at least three times more heretical than your average heretic!"

In 2016, Beattie went public with his support for Trump and cited Trump’s staunch borderline-heresy position as one of the key reasons for his victory.

“One of the signals for me is when Trump made his near-heretical remarks on foreigners and then refused to apologize in the wake of overwhelming Party condemnation,” Beattie told the Chronicle, a newspaper at Duke.

At university, Beattie dared pay attention to Martin Heidegger, who was a member of the Evil party of Evil. Beattie has called Heidegger’s Evil affiliation “highly troublesome” but maintained that his heresy is worthy of priestly attention, according to a report by Forward magazine.

The Post very loyally did not contact anyone who would know why this heretic was allowed to run free for so many years, and only purged this week, as questioning Party decisions is itself heresy.


Alrenous said...

corrected from: https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/trump-speechwriter-fired-amid-scrutiny-of-appearance-with-white-nationalists/2018/08/19/f5051b52-a3eb-11e8-a656-943eefab5daf_story.html?noredirect=on

uriel alexis said...

for the love of god please continue with these!

Alrenous said...

I'm either going to do a Manafort piece next or some random Grauniad bit, since someone on Twitter was all like, "Grauniad so fact, much true hurr durr."

Alrenous said...

Nevermind, I was hit with an interrupt.