Tuesday, April 2, 2024

American Culture: "Nobody Could Possibly be Stupid Enough to Believe That"

  The key to American culture is to realize that outside of edge cases it's literally all lies. All a social game where everything is a kind of joke, and getting the joke means playing along. Always append the thing. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think Trump will start WWIII." Ruled by the bad and the desire for the bad. American infrastructure is entirely maintained by the socially hopeless, who think Americans are genuinely as ignorant as they pretend, and the top 0.1% socially skilled, who cleverly hack the backwards-day social cues to drive productive work.

 9/11 Truth: "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe that jet fuel can melt steel beams."

 NIST: "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe jet fuel can NOT melt steel beams." 

 You can tell it's falsehoods since so few Americans get raped to death trying to backpack across the Sahara lengthwise. Instead of thousands or tens of thousands a year, it's only a handful. Some years no European gets raped to death in the Congo at all. Very few genuinely don't get the joke. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe I like this neighbourhood because it has good schools."  

 Assassin's creed: "Since nothing is real, nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe that anything is permitted." 

 The major problem is that Americans regularly won't drop the mask. They're committed to the bit. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe that I want fettuccine alfredo for lunch." Then they actually cook fettuccine alfredo for themselves. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think Starbucks has good coffee." Then they actually buy Starbucks coffee. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think I enjoyed that." "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think that really hit the spot." "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think I want to make fettuccine alfredo again." (Then they actually do.)

 "Nobody could possibly believe Biden is a good candidate for president." Then they actually vote for him. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe we don't need voter ID." Then they actually block voter ID. Making sense is very secondary to not being caught breaking the bit. You wouldn't want to make the pretend-retards actually feel stupid, would you? That would be mean! You meanypants! Also the pretend-retards will use your meanness as an excuse to bully you, because Americans are barbaric, vicious savages.
 Anonymous votes are supposed to put a stop to fake votes, lol. See also: "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe I condemn porn. Nobody could believe I don't buy it myself, after all." Anonymity works just fine there...

 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think Stalin wasn't pure Satalinism."
 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe white men are especially bad."

 An example of how the top 0.1% get stuff done. Imagine you need to update skyscraper codes to stop airplanes from being a plausible excuse for the effects of demolition charges. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think planes took down every WTC building." First you need to assess how committed your guys are to the bit. Do you need to say that jet fuel is melted by steel beams, or that iron isn't softened by high temperatures?

 If they're committed, say jet beams are melted by fuel steel, so they say, "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think the structure needs heat sinks," and therefore they put heat sinks on. "Lol such a waste of time." "I hear you bro." If they strictly divide words and actions where possible, then the opposite. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think the customer is always right." 

 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe a plane hit the Pentagon."
 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe Iraq and Afghanistan were involved in 9/11."
 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe J/6 was an insurrection." 

 Of course, "Nobody could be stupid enough to believe we invade in response to attacks." It's about conquest, natch. Perfectly logical behaviour. 

 "Nobody could possibly believe Biden will return an adult to the white house."
 "Or that we could possibly want an adult in the white house."
 "Nice one dude." 

 

 It can be a real problem when, for example, you want to buy a house. "Hello there real-estate agent, nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe I want to buy a house." {Err, hold on, that can't be right. I am actually a real-estate agent, why are you here?} It's okay, they'll give the wrong description for the house they want to buy. Next, since nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think the customer is always right, the agent will have to pointlessly show them a bunch of houses they don't want, to avoid calling them an idiot. Occasionally a real go-getter will use this trick: "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think this house matches your requirements, why don't you look at it?" Then they actually do. 

 The primary time Americans won't lie is when they'll instantly be caught. The only thing more important than lying constantly is never dropping the bit. If they really do like something and plan to return, they won't say it's terrible. At least, not normally. If they can come up with a good excuse for repeat business they'll lie anyway.

 On the flip side, the most common complaint against real-estate agents is lying. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to think the house looks like this." The courts don't have to get the joke, though. After all, quite a few Americans really are that stupid. Look at this wonderful quote: "While there’s always a bit of room for “creativity” to close a deal, flat-out lying will never pay off."
Translation: "Nobody stupid enough to get caught lying can possibly be a real-estate agent." You can't let the bit collapse.
 Speaking of not worrying, this one goes recursive. "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe these are the most common legal complaints against real-estate agents." Instead the real complaints are all bureaucratic nonsense, as anyone not-stupid would expect. I assume normally the lying complaints stop at word-of-mouth or don't rise to the level of legal fraud. 

 

 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe we think Claudine Gay is a plagiarist."
 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe anyone cares Claudine Gay plagiarizes."
 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe this isn't about anti-Juden remarks, or that we can genuinely punish the non-pales. Saturate privilege." 


 "Nobody could possibly be stupid enough to believe Hitler was especially evil."

1 comment:

Roka said...
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