Why I Feel Stupid Today: I Want Butler Gloves

 I was today years old when I realized I want butler gloves. Rather than cleaning the grime off doorknobs and cupboard handles and keyboards and all that stuff, have gloves, just clean the gloves. Probably in a washing machine.

 Also it took a painfully long time to realize [the gloves of the kind butlers use] are called, get this, butler's gloves. Amazon has them. 

 It's almost like butlers used gloves of that kind for a reason. Even if you have a butler, you can save him time by wearing some of his gloves yourself. Proper doorknobs need polishing daily...or you can just not touch them with your bare hands. 

 Take 'em off for going outside or merely when cleaning is less inconvenient than the gloves.